Most women these days would agree
that the inclusion of "Ms" on official documents in 1972 has been
beneficial. But why exactly?
The title "Ms" was
introduced as an alternative to "Miss" and "Mrs", thereby
giving women a third option and allowing them to keep their marital status
private. The word "Miss" originated from the word
"mistress," and has long been the title of unmarried women. The main
arguments against the use of both "Miss" and "Mrs" is that
it requires women to state whether or not they are married, therefore being
obliged to disclose this personal information whilst men do not even need to
mention their marital status.
Furthermore it is easy to misuse
the titles "Miss" and "Mrs". That is to say that calling a
grown woman "Miss" can be seen as demeaning and patronising, whilst
some women feel offended if they are called "Mrs" because this
suggests they are old.
This is not something unique to
our culture either, the idea that women must identify themselves in relation to
a man is very widespread.
Take the example of France,
where, until as recently as 2012, unmarried women were forced to identify
themselves as "Mademoiselle" on
all official forms. The word "Mademoiselle" originates from the words
"Ma Demoiselle", translating as "My Lady". However
the word also "harks back to the term
'oiselle', which means 'virgin' or 'simpleton'." (The Mail) The very idea that an
unmarried women should be less worthy and therefore referred to in terms of her
'simplicity' is quite shocking to think of in the 21st Century. Moreover,
despite the fact that "Mademoiselle" is no longer included on
official documents it is still widely used throughout France in both everyday
speech and literary texts. It is perhaps unsurprising that so many people
oppose the use of this title which highlights how ingrained male supremacy is
in our current society, despite people's best efforts to make a change. In British schools for example, male teachers are called "Sir" whilst female teachers are called "Miss". This may go back to the time when any working woman would give up her career upon marrying, thereby meaning that there would rarely be a teacher who was, indeed, a "Mrs". However, it still seems to me that these two titles infer inequality, an especially damaging idea to expose so many children to from such a young age.
The fact that the terms
"Miss" and "Mademoiselle" are often perceived as flattering
is also interesting. when some French women were interviewed and asked their
opinions on the term "Mademoiselle", many answered in a similar way
to "Magali, thirty, French teacher and the
mother of two, married" who said: "I am flattered to be called ‘mademoiselle’ in place of
‘madame’. It rejuvenates you." (The New Yorker). This brings up the
widespread view that women (and sometimes men as well) are too often cast aside
in their old age. our current society places so much value on youth and vigour
that we seem to overlook the wisdom and experience older, more mature people
can offer us. Therefore the fact that so many women are flattered by being
mistaken for younger than they are alludes to another issue which is how our
society views ageing. However, although there is more to say on this I will
leave it for another time.
In conclusion,
despite that many people disregard the existence of "Ms" as
being of much importance, viewing it as a petty matter and thinking that we
have more significant things to focus on, the word, although small, represents
a much larger battle. Namely the battle to allow women to be regarded as equals
to men, for, regardless of the laws in place, our society remains one which
often suppresses women. It is subtleties like the box we
tick on a form that can pave the way for a more just and equal future. For
anyone who thinks the fight is over, battle has been won, I urge them to think
again. We have made great progress, but we are by no means finished.
Written by Lili
Picture Credit: Ellen
Picture Credit: Ellen
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